Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?
A: Time to get a new bed!
Q: What was the first animal in space?
A: The cow that jumped over the moon!
Q: What is the quietest kind of a dog?
A: A hush puppy.
Q: How is a dog like a telephone?
A: It has a collar I.D.
Q: Why do cows wear bells?
A: Because their horns don’t work.
Q: How do you stop an rhino from charging?
A: Take away his credit card!
Q: What would happen if pigs could fly?
A: The price of bacon would go up.
Q: How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?
A: Take away his shovel!
Q: What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?
A: It gave a little wine!
Q: How do you catch a squirrel?
A: Climb up a tree and act like a nut!
A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night. When it came time to pay, the skunk didn’t have a scent, the deer didn’t have a buck so they put the meal on the duck’s bill.
Q: What did one cow say to the other?
A: Mooooooove over!